"Oh yeah! Didn't we win an Emmy for that episode?"-- Eddy

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Desolation Ed
DE Titlecard



Original Publish Date

October 18, 2009






Desolation Ed at

Desolation Ed is fanfic in progress by Jspyster1. Set in an alternate universe where laser guns, plasma technology, and nuclear power are the norm, computers display in monochrome, physics laugh in the face of even the most basic scientific principles, Kevin and Eddy still hate each other, and all of humanity was on the brink of nuclear annihilation. After years of fighting over the last remaining resources the inevitable apocalypse arrived in the form of nuclear devastation. As World War III reached its climax several countries across the world fired their nuclear payloads as a final attempt to wipe out their enemies, turning the entire earth into a nuclear wasteland. The Peach Creek kids survive the war by taking shelter in a recently constructed state-of-the-art nuclear bunker referred to as Vault 23. One day a computer chip regulator malfunctions leaving the emergency water reserve tanks vulnerable to pollution, Eddy is then forced to venture out into the Peach Creek wasteland to find the missing part necessary to solve this problem. As you may notice, the plot of the fanfic is heavily based off the Fallout video game series, more specifically the first one. Rest assure that this story won't be entirely ripped off from Fallout, I plan to incorporate my own original ideas and adventures into this fic. A sequel has been planned.


The time of the story takes place before the events of The Big Picture Show.

War, war never changes… The world's energy resources have almost been extinguished after generations of use. For decades the countries of the world have fought against each other in a futile attempt to control the last remaining reserves of earth's resources. Meanwhile the United State's old adversary, Russia, took advantage of the situation to once again try to rise above the rest of the nations to become the world's largest superpower. Testing to see how far they could exert their dominance, Russia invaded Alaska in an attempt to capture the U.S.'s remaining oil reserves. The U.S. retaliated and kicked the mighty armies back to the motherland. From that point on tensions between the two nations have escalated to a point where major nuclear ICBM launch sites had each others country's locations hotkeyed on the launch keyboard; ready to strike at a moment's notice.

Because of the approaching threat of a world wide nuclear holocaust, the U.S. government commissioned the Vault-Tec Corporation to build a set number of massive, blast-proof subterranean bunkers, nicknamed "vaults", all across the nation for the population to take shelter in as a last resort if "the bombs ever fell".

The inevitable eventually occurred...

In the early hours of one brisk October morning, the United States, Russia, and every other country with a nuclear program simultaneously fired each and every weapon in their nuclear arsenal; rockets, warheads, submarine guided missiles, bombers, the leaders of the world went all out and had nothing to lose, as mutually assured destruction already sealed the fate of the earth. People have debated which side fired first but in the end it didn't matter. The weapons of mankind's creation had scorched every corner of the earth, eliminating millions of innocent lives, while reducing entire continents into desolate wastelands. World War III abruptly started and ended within a matter of hours. Fortunately, a small fraction of the U.S.'s population was lucky enough to get a spot of their own inside one of Vault-Tec's coveted vaults, while others resolved to hiding in cheaper, sometimes makeshift, bunkers. But this isn't the story of the vault project or the war, nor resources nor global politics; this is the story of a certain member of Vault 23 and his quest to save the closest place he can call home. Vault 23 was built in a mountain on the outskirts of a small suburban town called Peach Creek. It was this vault where the children of the local neighborhood took shelter in when the bombs fell, it was one of the few structures to survive merciless wrath of the nukes, and it is in this vault where our story begins...


Main Characters

  • Eddy: The protagonist of the story. Eddy was one of the last to arrive in Vault 23 before the bombs fell. He and the rest of the kids have spent more than half a year inside the vault. Eddy is fed up with the vault lifestyle and wishes that things could be different. Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it) one day, Eddy was chosen by the Overseer to venture off into the Peach creek wasteland to find a replacement water chip for the vault. Eddy's previous job in the vault was "Pip-Boy Mechanic" despite the fact he claims he doesn't know anything about mechanical repair. Working in the maintenance department is one of the lowest jobs you can get in the vault (the other being "Sanitation Specialist") which accounts for one of the many reasons why Eddy has a negative view on life. He also suffers from Vault Depressive Syndrome.
  • Edd: Edd is still a good friend of Eddy. He accompanies Eddy during his quest near the second half of the story. His job in the vault is "librarian's assistant". During the events of Chapter 11, Edd's view on vault life is revealed. Though he does wish for the vault to permanently open up one day, he feels that violently forcing the overseer to open it should not occur unless the situation calls for it, such as if the water supply is exhausted to the point where trade with the locals is necessary. Edd's strong belief in Eddy's perseverance led him to believe that such a situation would be avoided. Edd is a pacifist and does not resort to violence... Unless absolutely necessary.
  • Ed: Ed is still friends with Edd and Eddy. Ed accompanies Eddy on his journey during the second half of the story. His job down in the vault is "Sanitation Specialist", a pretentious way of describing the profession of the guy who unclogs all the stopped up toilets, he doesn't seem to mind his job despite how crummy it is. Likewise, he doesn't mind the monotony of vault life.

Major Characters

  • Elron H. Tompson: An original character created by the author. Elron is the overseer of Vault 23, which means he is in charge of managing all that goes on in the Vault. Elron is a 19-20 year old boy from Lemon Brook. He was appointed overseer of the vault because his father supposedly has ties with the government. Elron always tries to portray a cheery attitude to the other vault citizens in hopes to increase their enthusiasm in their work, however most of the citizens find him extremely annoying. Elron was the one who chose Eddy to recover a replacement water chip for the vault. His first name is a pun of science fiction novelist L. Ron Hubbard.
  • Kevin: Kevin is somewhat of a minor antagonist. He is mostly seen teasing Eddy while inside the vault. Later, he holds a secret meeting with the rest of the Peach Creek kids regarding his views on vault life and the overseer. Due to his knowledge of repair and mechanics, Kevin works as an engineer for the vault's power grid.
  • Jonny: Jonny is also a citizen of Vault 23. He, along with Plank, act as door guards outside the Overseer's office on the 1st level of the vault. He still retains his energetic personality. He also likes to chat with the other kids in his spare time.
  • Rolf: Another citizen of Vault 23 who makes a larger appearance in Chapter 11. Rolf is sick of vault life and wishes to return back to the simple life of a farmhand. Rolf is the "Fry Cook" for the cafetorium, despite the job requiring him to just peel potatoes all day. Rolf believed that technology had ushered in mankind's destruction and that the whole war could have been avoided if the nations of the world weren't obsessed with creating the biggest weapons to nuke each other with. What he failed to realize was that no matter the circumstance, people will always find a way to kill each other. After all, war never changes.
  • Nazz: Nazz finally makes an appearance in Chapter 11 where it is revealed she works as a nurse in the vault's clinic. Unlike most of the kids, Nazz has adapted well to life in the vault.
  • Sarah: Sarah was first mentioned in Chapter 1 but didn't make a full appearance until Chapter 11. Being a few shy years of the working age, Sarah spends most of her time in the vault forcing other vault dwellers to obey her every command. She usually achieves this goal by threatening to report them to the overseer with wrongful accusations.
  • Jimmy: Jimmy made an appearance in Chapter 11. The threat and the effect of a worldwide nuclear attack had a negative psychological impact on Jimmy. He views the vault as the safest place on earth and has come to accept its rather mundane lifestyle.
  • The Kanker Sisters: The Kankers have all been bestowed with tasks dealing with work in the maintenance department; a position frowned upon by vault society. Lee works as a "Garbage Burner", Marie works as "Laundry Cannon Operator", while May works as "Assistant Laundry Cannon Operator".The Kanker Sisters make an appearance in Chapter 11 where they still try to hit-on/sexually harass the remaining Eds.
  • Robert "Rosie" Conagher: An OC created by the author. Rosie is a a traveling junk merchant whom Eddy meets in Chapter 5. An unnamed character that briefly appeared in Chapter 4 scooping fecal matter out of a cow pen was retconed into Rosie. He speaks with a southern accent and is always seen wearing a welder's mask over his face to hide a hideous mutation that gave him his nickname. He carries an antique LeMat revolver with him at all times. Rosie's appearance, surname, as well as his heritage is based off the Engineer from the game Team Fortress 2, his mutation was inspired by a similarly named Splicer from the game Bioshock, while his eccentric personality is based off of the character of "Howling Mad" Murdock from the 80s television series The A-Team.
  • Joey Black: An OC created by the author. Joey is the leader of a malicious group of raiders. After a scouting party of raiders attacks Eddy and his friends, Eddy swore revenge against Joey. A posse was formed in Hubcap Flats dedicated to bringing him to justice. Not much else is known about Joey at this time. His facial appearance is described as "An emo kid crossed with Thomas Edison". Joey is trigger happy and has been known to shoot at his own team mates.

Minor Characters

  • Various Kids from Lemon Brook: Vault 23 is also populated with many other kids from Lemon Brook. These kids are a lot older and stronger than the Peach Creek Kids. Due to their greater strength, they are usually tasked with working on the more difficult maintenance jobs in the vault though some are given more glamorous jobs such as a position on the vault's security team.
  • Keith: Keith first appeared in Chapter 3 where he helped defeat the scorpion attacking Eddy. He then invites Eddy into his settlement for brief protection. He is described with a southern accent and the appearance of a hobo.
  • Dr. Morbid: Dr. Morbid first appeared in Chapter 4 where he patched up Eddy's injured hand.
  • Killian Darkwater: Killian is the Mayor, Sheriff, Chief Justice and occasionally the Executioner of the Junktown Settlement. He was almost assassinated by a hitman working for Gizmo until Eddy saved his life.
  • Gizmo: Was first mentioned in Chapter 4 but didn't make an appearance until Chapter 5. He is a morbidly obese mobster who owns a casino in the southern end of Junktown. He hired an assassin to take out Killian because he saw him as a "goody-goody-two shoe". Eddy managed to get his confession which eventually lead to his demise.
  • Sydney Watson: Sydney is the bodyguard of Rosie's caravan and lifelong friend. She first appeared in chapter 6 where she helps escort Rosie's caravan. She wields an Uzi sub machinegun.
  • Ivan Abelev: Ivan is the overseer and the only male inhabitant of Vault 69. He spends most of his time drinking, partying, harassing women, or any combination of the three. He appears in Chapter 10.
  • Tom: An eccentric hermit Eddy meets in Chapter 12. Tom lives in a small tent along a rocky outcrop and offers directions to Eddy. He also has an obsession with tending a rather large cooking pot.

Original Characters Submitted by the Readers

  • Daniel Santiago: An OC submitted by "Akuma no Musuko". Daniel is a Hispanic man taught in the ways of repair and sheet metal by his father, Gabriel. He lived in a village near the Mexican-American named Oaxaca Nueva. when he was 17 his village was overrun by Super Mutants. Daniel and a few others managed to survive. His father wasn't so lucky. Saddened by his father's death, Daniel took some of the fallen scrap metal and forged a battle axe out of it. He then left the remains of his village and moved to the safety of Hubcap Flats where he joined the city police force, swearing to prevent the town from suffering a similar fate as his village. Daniel first appears in Chapter 7 where Eddy joins the posse he's in.
  • Lucas G. (Gerald) Smith: Lucas Smith was submitted by "LucasBravvus97" a.k.a. User:Terribith0997. Lucas (Smith) managed to get a spot in Vault 18 before the bombs fell, the rest his family wasn't so fortunate. After the vault opened Lucas moved to Hubcap Flats, tired of Vault life. He appears in Chapter 7 in the posse.
  • Cody Sanderson: Cody was submitted by User:Gamechanl44. Cody lived in an unmarked vault by himself. He ventured out one day in search of food and eventually came across the settlement of Hubcap Flats. He joined the police force in order to make money to put food on his table. He appears in Chapter 7 as a member of the posse.
  • Jean Quake: Jean was submitted by "Key and Lock". Jean is a mysterious man, his face shrouded by a black mask. He claims to be skilled in hand-to-hand combat and trap disarming. Not much else is known about his back story. He prefers to stay silent. He appears in Chapter 7, in the posse.
  • Jay: Jay was submitted by User:Eddlikeshotsauce. Jay is a teenage boy with a hereditary condition that causes him to twitch and flinch. His father was injured by a raider and is the reason why Jay joined the posse. He appears in Chapter 7.
  • Kyle Cornwell: Kyle was submitted by "Atlas59". Kyle has been in the Hub police force ever since the town first started. He was the man who organized a posse together to take out Joey Black. He appears in Chapter 7.
  • Atwater Renstad: Atwater was submitted by User:Kirkland22. Atwater first appeared in Chapter 8 where he is mostly seen drinking beer along with Jacoren. Like his comrades, Atwater is trigger happy and enjoys the suffering and murder of others. He is skilled with knives and close-quarters combat.
  • Jacoren: Jacoren was submitted by Kevinbman. A flaming pyromaniac, Jacoren is skilled with the tactical uses of thermal energy and has a burning desire to see his enemies ablaze (OK, I'll stop with the fire puns). He is a heavy drinker and enjoys taunting the victims he has captured during his career as a raider.
  • Frederick von Richter a.k.a. The Baron: The Baron was submitted by Evil Tim 17. The Baron is a Nazi-wannabe with a passion for all things Hitler. Ever since he raided a museum of its WWII possessions, The Baron has thought of himself as the unofficial leader of Joey Black's gang. He serves as the right hand man to Joey Black and oversees all of the gang's activities.
  • Spearhead: Spearhead was submitted by User:Dr. Angryslacks. A mysterious figure who acted as a spy during Chapter 7. Spearhead was responsible for leaking the posse's plans to the raider gang. Spearhead masks his voice with a strange accent and wears a hooded robe in order to conceal his identity. He is also addicted to jet.



  • Vault 23: A large underground vault built by the Vault-Tec Corporation which was to act as a shelter to the children of Peach Creek and the surrounding area. The vault cost about $620,000,000,000 to build (Believe it or not, I'm not exaggerating). The Cul-de-Sac kids reside here as well as the kids from Lemon Brook for a reason yet to be revealed. The Overseer of the vault is Elron H. Thompson. Vault 23 was originally supplied with an extra waterchip in event the first one ever malfunctioned but during a mix-up with the shipping department the spare chip was sent to another location. It was from this vault where Eddy emerged to start his quest for the water chip. The vault is located around the outskirts of Peach Creek, in the mountains to the north west of the junkyard. Vault 23 is based on a blend of different vaults from the Fallout series, notably vaults 13 (as it was the primary inspiration), 19, (the segregation of two different groups of people), and 29 (where the population consists of only children).
  • Vault 69: This is the vault Elron told Eddy to search first for the water chip. According to past records, the occupants of Vault 69 consist of 999 women and only one man. It finally makes an appearance in Chapter 10 where it is revealed to host 24 hour nonstop parties. Ivan Abelev is the single male occupant and as well as the overseer.
  • Lemon Brook: Lemon Brook is a similarly named town that lies south of Peach. The two towns share a heated rivalry with each other that dates back to before the war. On the outskirts of Lemon Brook lies a factory which used to produce novelty joke toys from before the war but it now serves home to the entrance of the Lemon Brook vault. Despite the town having its own vault for the population to take shelter in, a select group of children from Lemon Brook were separated from their parents and were forced to live inside Vault 23 for reasons unknown. While Lemon Brook was first mentioned in Chapter 1 the city did not actually appear until Chapter 13. Eddy learns from an old hermit that the city has been overrun with the walking dead. Upon entering the city Eddy finds that the cadaverous figures roaming the streets aren't zombies but rather the horribly mutated citizens of the Lemon Brook vault.
  • Junktown: Junktown is a settlement located in the junkyard built by survivors of the war. Killian Darkwater's father founded the town and was the mayor until his death. The town is now lead by Killian himself. Eddy took shelter in this town after a radscorpion attack. The town consists mostly of shacks built from sheet metal. It includes a medical clinic, a general store, and a casino run by a local mobster.
  • Peach Creek Suburbs: The suburbs are home to the Rockwell's residence as well as the Cul-de-Sac where the kids used to live. Most of the houses in the neighborhood have been devastated by the nukes while very few managed to hold out. Ed's House was among the very few to stay intact.
  • Hubcap Flats: a.k.a. "The Hub", is a location first mentioned by Rosie in Chapter 6 and later debuted in Chapter 7. It is a major settlement where traders and merchants from across the wasteland come to offer their goods and services. The town is led by a wealthy merchant named Jethro who founded the town after he emerged from the shelter of a local used car dealership. He named the town in honor of said dealership. The town is located on the outer rim of Downtown Peach Creek is a district formerly called "The Slums". Residents occupy and set up shop inside the hollowed out remains of pre-war buildings. The Hub also is home to several business and services such as a bar, a police station, as well as a branch office of water merchants. It was in the Hub where where Eddy joined a posse to take out Joey Black.


  • The Junkyard Factory: The factory first appeared in Chapter 3. It somehow survived the nuclear blasts from when the bombs fell. Eddy first ventures into the factory after he left the vault. The factory's previous machinery has been cleared out and remains mostly empty except for the occasion pile of junk (it is a junkyard factory after all). An over-sized rat dwells within the darkness of the factory, possibly due to the radiation emitted by the nuclear bombs that destroyed Peach Creek.
  • Sullen Souls Funeral Home: A pre-war funeral home that now serves as the hideout of Joey Black and his gang. It was first mentioned in Chapter 7 and later made a full appearance in Chapter 8. The funeral home is two stories tall and contains a tunnel system, dug out by the raiders and filled with jail cells to trap and torture their victims, and a cemetery, complete with its own ossuary that serves as Joey Black's throne and treasure room. The funeral home is located in an old strip mall.
  • Lake Garcia: Lake Garcia is the primary source of where the Hubcap Flats branch of water merchants import their water from. It was briefly mentioned in Chapter 7.
  • Apple River: A location mentioned by Tom in Chapter 12. Little is known about this location other than that a group of tribals live there who are, as stated by Tom, "too weird, even for me". The location has been named akin to that of both Peach Creek and Lemon Brook.


The WaterChip Arc

The daily life of Eddy down in Vault 23.

Eddy is called forth to seek out the water chip.

Eddy gets a rude welcoming in the wasteland.

Eddy discovers a settlement of survivors in the junkyard.

Eddy carries out the deadly proposition offered to him by Killian Darkwater.

Eddy discovers the ruins of the Cul-de-Sac and runs into trouble.

Eddy explores the town of Hubcap Flats and joins a posse of law bringers.

Eddy and the posse assault the Sullen Souls Funeral Home.

Eddy takes care of some last minute business in Hubcap Flats.

Eddy reaches the infamous Vault 69.

The kids hold a secret meeting back in Vault 23.

Eddy finds a mysterious stranger in the mountains. No, not that Mysterious Stranger.

Eddy is chased by an otherworldly horde through the town of Lemon Brook.

  • Chapter 14

15% complete

Wasteland Oddjobs Arc (Working Title)

  • TBA

The Mutant Terror Arc

  • TBA

Eddy's Inventory

DE inventory

Eddy's Inventory (circa Chapter 13)

Below is a list of items Eddy has in his backpack, or on his person, that he has collected throughout the story.

  • 10mm Handgun
  • Box of 10mm ammo
  • Hunting Rifle (Outdated .32 caliber variant)
  • Box of .32 rifle ammo (limited)
  • “Undertaker” minigun
  • 1 belt of custom ammo for the minigun.
  • Combat Knife
  • Vault 23 Water Flask (Full)
  • 1 Bottle of Purified Water
  • Medkit: (Bandages, a roll of gauze, aspirin, ointment, 5 stimpacks, “Coping With Mr. Virus” Pamphlet)
  • 4 Bobby Pins
  • Food Packages: Meat Jerky, 1 Pep-Bar, Can-O-Spam, Meal-Ready-to-Eat bag (Liver & Yogurt Flavor).
  • Vault 69 Overseer Notes + Ms. Kattswelle’s medical file + passkey to the clinic.
  • Pocket Lint
  • 394 bottlecaps


  • The shortest amount of time it took to write a chapter was 1 day (Chapter 1) while the longest time it took to write a chapter was 6 months (Chapter 4) 3+ years (Chapter 14).
  • In Chapter 1, Ed is reading a "Grognak the Barbarian" comic book. Not only it this a parody of Conan the Barbarian, but it is also an actual item featured in Fallout 3.
  • The final line of Chapter 1, "...but life in the vault was about to change." is an homage to the ending line of the original Fallout intro "Life in the vault is about to change."
  • The Overseer has Eddy's full name listed as "Eddy Skipper McGee" though Eddy admits in Chapter 2 that "McGee" isn't really his last name and he only pretends it to be "because it rhymes”. This pokes fun on how some people believe that Eddy's last name is "McGee".
  • Lower numbered vaults are located on the West Coast of America while higher numbered vaults are located on the East Coast. Since Vault 23 is considered a lower number, this suggests that Peach Creek is somewhere on the West Coast of America even though Vault 69, which is a "middle" number and would be located in the Midwest, is only a few miles away. This was purposely done to add mystery to the location of Peach Creek.
  • Vault 23 shares similarities with Vault 29, as both only allowed children in their vault and their parents were redirected to another vault.
  • Running Gag: Eddy believes that anything marked with the label "Standard Issue" is Communist. This is most prevalent in Chapter 1.
  • In Chapter 6, Eddy stumbles upon an issue of "Fox Paws" magazine. Not only is this an homage to "Cat's Paw" magazine from the Fallout series but it is also a play on the phrase "Faux Pas". The description of the magazine from the story is also an homage to the description of the magazine from the game.
  • The initials for Desolation Ed are "DE" which happens to spell "ED" backwards. This was an unintentional coincidence.
  • Many stores from the show are mentioned by Eddy in Chapter 7. These include the Candy Store, Danny's Meat Shop, Lih's Supply Co., AKA Shoes, as well as Parsley Haven from the tabloid "The Gravy Inquirer".
  • The Super 6 Motel is based upon the "Super 8" and "Motel 6" chain of motels. The sign in front of the motel in Chapter 7 is a parody of Motel 6's slogan "We'll keep a light on for ya".
  • The "Sicilian Eagle" restaurant in Chapter 7 is a parody of the "Maltese Falcon", a 1930's detective novel as well as the name of a bar in the original Fallout game.
  • The "Liver and Yogurt Burrito" bag that Eddy has in his backpack is a reference to the episode "Oath to an Ed", where the Eds attempt to microwave a Liver & Yogurt burrito for an Urban Ranger badge.
  • The way Eddy talks while trying to sell the vacuum cleaner in Chapter 7 is an homage to Vince Offer, better known as "The ShamWow! Guy". Eddy uses similar phrases such as "You followin me?" and "We Americans make good stuff." and "Cuz we can't do this all day."
  • Some of the names on the wanted posters in Chapter 7 are references to people who worked on the show. These include Scott Underwood and "Big" Jim Miller. The name "Kril" is an homage to a character from Ed, Edd n Eddy Fallout: Saviors of the Wastes.
  • The quote Jacoren shouts down to the trapped woman in the well at the beginning of Chapter 8 is a reference to a famous quote spoken by the antagonist of the movie "Silence of the Lambs".
  • In Chapter 10 Rosie claims to have met several interesting people during his travels, two of which are references to characters in the Fallout series. He mentions a ghoulish fella, as well as a robotic metal fella, the latter of which he could relate to.
  • The stack of movie holotapes Eddy picks up in Chapter 10 are references to movies in the Fallout World. The first movie, "Prepare for the Future", is the title of Fallout 3 teaser trailer, "Leaving the Vault", was a movie shown in the intro of Fallout 2 which taught people how to successfully step out of a vault, and the third movie, "Happy Trails", was a movie played to every overseer within Vault 11.
  • Eddy's final line of Chapter 10 "...Little slice of paradise" was the original working title for the chapter.
  • The substandard operation system Edd works with on the computer in Chapter 11 is a mockery of Windows Vista.
  • In Chapter 11, the description of how Rolf's chickens died during the war is a reference the description of Kentucky Fried Chicken's secret recipe.
  • Apple River was a name conceived six years ago by the author. It was originally going to be used as the name of the town, the kids moved to, in a fanfic the author planned to write. Plans for the fanfic's release fell through and Apple River was forgotten until recently when it got a mention in Chapter 12.
  • The dialouge Tom states in Chapter 12, "I'm not unreasonable. I mean I don't eat the eyeballs!", is a reference to the song Re: Your Brains by Jonathan Coulton.
  • The description of how the ghouls in Chapter 13 are turned into a "thin red paste" is a reference to the notoriously (and somewhat controversially) graphic combat results featured in the combat prose of the Fallout series' spiritual predecessor, Wasteland.


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