"Oh yeah! Didn't we win an Emmy for that episode?"-- Eddy
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Ed Abuse II is a sequel to Ed Abuse. Unlike the last fanfiction, this fanfiction is focused on Eddy and his brother. It can be found in The3Eds.com and Fanfiction.net.
Ever since that dream that Eddy had, he's been treating Ed nicer and nicer, to the point that he doesn't make Ed make scams anymore. But after a UFO scam, Eddy's Brother returns to the cul-de-sac. It's not for a family visit - no! Rather, Eddy's Brother wants to kill Eddy. Eddy, fearful of his brother, tries to warn the others in a unique way, but Eddy's Brother catches on, and decides to kill him now. But he is able to escape with Ed and Edd, but they get into an argument, after which Eddy decides the only way out.
Ed: “I know you are, but what am I?” Eddy: “An idiot.”
Jonny: “You cannot be king of the cul-de-sac, Mr. Eddy’s Brother. Last summer, Plank became the new king of the Cul-De-Sac, and by law, you cannot claim rule over it without a- Hey! Give him back!” Eddy's Brother: “So, Plank’s “King”, huh?” [He held Plank high in the air] “What’s my punishment for this?” [He snapped Plank in half] Jonny[weakly]: “Plank..?” [Eddy’s Brother threw the pieces to the ground] “Pl… a… nk? PLAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK!”
Ed [crying]: “Who’s going to pat me on the head when I do something right? Who’s going to use me for scams? Who’s going to butter my toast?”
Edd: “No… he didn’t… No… NO!!!!! WHY?!! WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO CUT YOUR LIFELINE SHORT, EDDY MCGEE?! WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO LEAVE US?! IT’S NOT FAIR!! WE’RE SORRY, OKAY?! EDDY! DON’T YOU DARE DIE ON US! EDDY?! EDDY!!!”
Eddy: “I really am dead, but am I really in heaven?” [He looked behind him.] “D’oh. A stairway to Heaven and heck. I forgot.” [He looked down.] “Can God be at least decent enough to give me some clothes?” [Like magic, clothes appeared on Eddy’s person.] “Thank you!”
Eddy: “When am I expected back here?” Danny: “You can decide that on your own, but the latest will be at the Apocalypse, on December 21st, 2012.” Eddy: “What?! That’s a load of baloney!” Danny: “I was just kidding. Next question.”
Eddy: “I’m sorry, Double D! For everything! I promise to do better!” Edd: “I’m sorry too, Eddy, for yelling at you.” Eddy: “Hmm… toochey.” Edd: “I think you mean touché, Eddy.”
Eddy: “If I don’t survive if I defeat my brother, then I just want you to not mourn over my dead body. Also, Kevin, you owe me 25 cents.”
Eddy: “I know everyone thought I was dead, but I was just uncoo… just uncee…” [He looked over to Edd as if to ask a question.] Edd: “I think the term Eddy’s looking for is..” [He cleared his throat.] “Dead from the neck up.”
This fanfiction seems to continue after Ed Abuse, as the events of the fanfiction were just a dream by Eddy. The events of the dream have had an effect on Eddy's behavior.
This fanfiction is rated PG-13.
Edd and Eddy get into their biggest argument yet.
Plank is snapped in half by Eddy's brother (with drastic effects by Jonny).